Who is "we" and what do you mean by overdoing?

By "we," I mean girls and guys in general, and by "overdoing," I mean the girls paying an enormous amount of money for expensive clothing when it is not who they are, and guys renting impressive cars or taking girls to the most expensive restaurants for first dates. I mean girls who spend hours doing their hair for a single date, and girls who go crazy trying to take a good photo for their shidduch 'resumes' (which are ridiculous in the first place). I mean both girls and guys who show off more than necessary in order to impress a date, especially when it means they're trying to be more than they actually are. I mean people who are charm itself when they need to get a date but once they are rejected or get married, they go back to being a 'regular city pigeon.'

It was just a thought that was passing through my head though, so don't over-analyze it. Take it as it is -- just a thought. :]

our cusom with dating is just going to a hotel lounge and buying drinks. fancy? no, just presentable. we dont dress up or anything.

but u are right, dont try too hard, just be yourself and that should be enough

Neh, the female pigeon was probably just nearsighted.

As far as dating, put on whatever bling you want as long as you don't support the retarded shadchan system.

"Guys taking girls to the most expensive restaurants." (Snort)

"our cusom with dating is just going to a hotel lounge and buying drinks." -- I know that's what many people do, but there is also a significant number that overdoes it.

SubWife -- Care to elaborate on that snort?

Ok, elaborating on the snort. First off, no offense was intended. Secondly, unless the times have changed, neither I nor my friends have ever been taken to the most expensive restaurants, esp on first dates. Ever. Restaurants? Yes. Good restaurants? yes. Most expensive? No. One would be lucky to get a drink of the first date.

But you have already answered that in your previous column. Unlike you, I don't know anyone in the male population who is "overdoing it."

I took no offense at the snort, I just needed some words to reply to. It's kind of hard to reply to a snort, if you know what I mean.

"Secondly, unless the times have changed, neither I nor my friends have ever been taken to the most expensive restaurants, esp on first dates." -- Well, that was your personal experience. This post was based on things that people I know actually experienced. Every person experiences different things, I guess.

And I'm not only talking about the guys who are overdoing it. There are girls who are also overdoing it by worrying too much over their looks and wasting a lot of time on their hair, makeup, and clothing.